I’m no stranger to rejections.
Rejections are something that I must go through to grow.
There are rejections coming from personal relations where
the first cut is always the deepest. Rejections start during childhood – when my
only friend got a new best friend or when my group realizes they don’t need me
anymore. It could also be the time when my playmates decide to kick me out of
the game. As I grow, rejections evolve into something more. It hides in the
face of my ultimate crush finally getting his first girlfriend. It manifests in
the relationships I almost had. Rejection is also when, no matter how hard I
try to patch things up with someone, things just don’t work as they are
supposed to.
And then, there’s rejection coming from my professional
experience. I’ve probably had countless interviews that I failed to pass. For
what reason? I have no idea.
I’ve done the good and the bad when it comes to interviews.
Good is when I scan and browse the company’s website. Read about what they do,
if not what makes them special. I do my research, take notes, and get the context
clues for when the interview deepens, all those little details come in handy.
I have done the bad. Scan the website nonchalantly. Expect
nothing more because, from the get-go, my efforts were nothing compared to my
competitors. As time passes by, I learned when to expect rejection and when to keep
my hopes up. Sadly, sometimes, they just don’t seem to add up. It hurts most when
I have given 100% and end up not getting that promotion, not even a step closer
to the proverbial ladder of professional success.
In hindsight, rejection offers awareness. I realize how fate
is being played out, it’s unpredictable. I am aware that things may not turn
out the way I expected them to. When I confidently say, it’s in the bag, a few
seconds after, it really is not. I realize how little details affect the gravity
of the outcome. I can determine that in my pursuits, although I have given
100%, it may only amount to 5% in other people’s eyes. Do I have a hold on
that? The answer would be a flat no.
As time goes by, I have learned how rejection offers the opportunity
to try again. When things don’t go out as planned, I won’t mope around the idea
of not being selected, for the whole day. (Or okay, I may mope for an hour and
be done with it) Rejection means I have attempted something and this something
may move my mark one step closer to the goal. The mere attempt is already growth
because along with it are the virtues that I mustered to make that single
attempt happen. It also teaches me perseverance. Do you know that feeling when
your shoes are new? You get blisters but the more you wear them, the blisters
disappear. You get used to them. It’s tricky to say that I would get used to rejection
because that’s not the goal. The goal is always to stand up after every
rejection.
I remembered a dear friend of mine back when I had a really
hard time. I asked her, “what made you this strong?”. She replied, “You know, I
had so many family issues to deal with when I was younger. The problems I have
now do not necessarily compare!” The pitfalls were what our storylines sound
more compelling. With rejection, one rejection would not kill you. With plenty
of rejections, you either decide to give up or continue and make those your ticket
to the long-shot ride to success.
With rejection comes acceptance. This has got to be the most
difficult part of the rejection. When you assess what went wrong, what you lack,
or what they failed to see in you. With acceptance comes humility that we may
lack something or is not the person they were necessarily looking for. With my
rejections, I learned to accept that while I may not be enough for them,
somewhere, somehow, I may be more than enough for someone else.
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