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Showing posts from March, 2016

retreat

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Stress! When you aim more control over most aspects in your life, it gives you this palpable feeling of being worn out. Decisions… how hard can it be? Absolutely difficult. At this point in time, I will be turning a year older, more pressured than ever to think about my future. Where to go? What to do? Who to be with? At 29, what do I want to achieve in life? Call it birthday blues, but really, I feel like a balloon suspended in thin air. Loneliness is creeping through me. Relationships… well, it's good while it lasts. Friends--- they all come and go. I feel like a luxurious ship with no direction, and quite frankly it's getting boring. I crave zest. I crave energy. I crave fullness and inner strength that comes from within, For the longest time, I've been building myself to be strong and independent but it gets tiring. To remain standing despite the blows, to dodge a bullet by an inch, to continue fighting-- win or lose… it gets the bette

Te Amo Self

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Why do I write only when I am feeling something out of the ordinary? Forgive me for adding noise to the already loud world. Perhaps having your birthday in days’ time always provokes you into thinking some things about your life. Which by the way, I have been successful at evading until now. Now that I am about to be shucks…29! * cough * I feel that I need to recreate in my life in such a way that it would be pleasing to my ears, to my heart and especially to my soul. Believe it or not, I feel that some of my life goals are put on hold because I kept on waiting for it. I ALWAYS wait. I feel guilty to leave things behind so I tend to always come back to where it started. I’m talking in riddles, yes? I am in Singapore yet my mind goes back to the Philippines . I miss everything about home except traffic, heat, exhaustion and slow government agencies. It’s like having my best foot two steps ahead of the other so I sometimes lose balance. My sister asked me, “what