Posts

Showing posts from October, 2010

tied up

Image
Things to do: TOO MANY TO MENTION Alright, I made a list on the things needed to be done. Boohoo! Not a single of it erased and labeled done. I think that I've got so little time, so little money for it. Some things are just put in priorities. And needless to say, these things are tied up and depend upon the upcoming trip. What do I have but a single job, a single salary, a single source of money. I'm trying my best to cope financially. (I know this is off lol). Funny as it may sound, money is that needed. Practically, almost everything requires money. But of course, I cannot argue that it guarantees happiness. Working in a bank, proves and objects that, depending on circumstances. My daily routine is to oversee everything that involves money. At times, they can just be plain papers, counting it is like counting cards (the one you play when you were younger). Anyway, First on my list is my driving. Pop wouldn't allow me unless I enroll myself in a driving school. (Doesn'

waking up in es-gee!

Image
'Cause that's what you get for waking up in ES-GEE! So how many days to go? Less than 2 weeks? OHMY! This is gonna be it. This is something insanely huge. Topping it for the "why list" is that... I am emptying my savings for it. In fact, I'd be indebted. How poor can I go? How low can I bargain? I don't actually know. Tentatively, it runs a little more than twenty grand excluding of the travel fare. But Geez, Who cares? I'd be packing my bags, downloading songs on my ipod, gathering maps and saving all the more. I can't wait. Once again, I am running into a bigger scope. It's like climbing a mountain, the climb is tedious, amazingly tricky and sure needs a lot of energy. But once you get into the peak, see for yourself, it's worth every sweat! And until such time I'd be tucking myself with a seat belt, turning off all my electronic devices, listening carefully to heart-known instructions and praying silently for safety, I'd just be cros

Rush

Image
And my sister blurted out, "magkaka boyfriend na yan, Ma". And I was like, "who?". She said, "You!" Wow! Buti pa sya alam nya, ako hindi. Unexpectedly, my mother's face lit up. She giggled and went on to ask on who's the lucky guy. "Secret!", she heard me. Sometimes, I am confused with my parents' reaction really. They seem to be so protective of me, telling me not to have a relationship yet, enjoy my being single and stuffs. Then one moment, they're out there, telling me I am twenty three and I need to explore relationships. They're excited. Tell me, Saan nga ba ako lulugar? There's no one to blame but my mahaderang older sister. How imaginative of her to link me with this guy I barely knew. (alright, he's the one I am crushing with). My mother is asking me nonstop. I never knew she have known about someone... hah! I thought she was blind, ako pa ang nasorpresa. hayyy Kung ako lang, okay na sana eh. Kaso nga, hindi pi

private property

Image
Disaster! Geez! I never imagined it could be this uneasy. It's purely trivial and intimidating. Blankly, I hate it. I hate how my mother is involved with facebook and my father as an accessory to the crime of spying on me. Mygosh! Surely, this is something new. All my comments, remarks, posts and even a simple like on a statement are familiar to them. Those friends who constantly comment on my shoutouts, they seem to investigate. Hello world. What the heck?! This should not come as something really really irritating right? When your parents are innovative enough to cope with the changing times? When your parents are possibly protecting you from all the harm an unwanted stranger comments? Or when the parents are learning digitally? Duh. The more I think about it the more I begin to want that my password be changed (because admittingly, my password is stored and my mother can easily open or should I say hack my account?). Or yes, probably block my mother from my friend's list? (I

I crush you!

Image
Getting all hyped up. I saw his picture and there goes my heart, poppin like a mad motorbike. I wish, I wish... Well, this is unsolicited. I promised myself to keep mum about certain aspects in my life. They're calling me desperate, I find it really pathetic. I hate how I get affected with the things I hear, those things worth not to be heard as it strike deep emotions. I hate how people take control over my emotions. I don't need dictations. I am full of it. Anyway, my sister is so excited. It started with my excitement, letting her know that I am crushing someone who's from somewhere, a friend of a friend. I gave her the link and told her to check him out... WHOA! As expected, she finds him really really cute ( like I do) and more. I had the best laugh when she told me, she's gonna befriend him on facebook, tell him about my being crushing him. haha plus the blackmail! then the gut feeling and the daydreaming of mister cuteeey whom she wants to have "lihi" w

Ambitions

Image
Sayang ka! Wow, words I think I do not want to hear. Words I expect not to hear from people who knows me best especially when it pertains to currently made decisions. I think that it provokes regrets and disappointment. It provokes lowliness rather than rising up. But sometimes, it provokes better thinking... We were having lunch in our very own office pantry and our boss joined us. I was silent for awhile as I am worried about the upcoming school exam. I just sat there, staring at the wall point-blankly. Then I heard my boss said something. I did not mind because I thought she was talking to my other mate. I heard her mumble, "Pee!" so I looked at her and she told me... "What is your ambition?" I was surprised and said "So random, Why do you ask ma'am?" She told me that she was just curious. And I said, "Well, one thing's for sure, I never imagined myself in a bank. I was just devastatingly tempted to apply for it because my friends are here

moving out

Image
Realizations... Everyday is a realization. One moment it hit me, the next it does again. Sometimes I begin to wonder, I think I'm thinking too much. So here comes the fact that I am really interested to go abroad. Perhaps, I could find a work there,live and settle. I don't know. I am really tempted to explore the world. It is within my reach. But what's stopping me is the thought of my parents. I mean, I could not just move out and transfer someplace else. My mom's health is unpredictable. Pop's with her. I feel that I am to stay beside them. I feel that I have the purpose to stick with them whatever happens. The confusion is between my goals and sticking to home. I am young, If there's something young people do, it is to explore the world outside the box. Alright, I do have my share of those fair trips but what if I want to stay longer in such a place? I think I am compelled to just stay where I am right now. The thought kills me because I want to be happy. It&

Till we meet again

Image
If it's meant to be, then it is meant to be... The irony of it all is that, even sayings, quotes or whatever you call it, has its own counterpart. In this case, "It's you who make your own destiny." Isn't it confusing? complicated? and extremely doubtful? Ah... the true meaning of life. So now to the story proper... A good friend finally decided to take off. She has finally decided to just let go and dive. I remembered the night she texted me and said, "Pee, I have told them" and surprised, I am not. I have been expecting it. In fact, I have expected it to happen early on. We were two separate individuals bonded by the career we chose. We met years ago in college and haven't really known each other until the moment we sat in the airport waiting for our jet. That was almost three years ago. But perhaps it was destiny. I remembered applying for another bank before graduation. I had my interview days after. One day, I went there and talked to the perso