and it starts today
Foolish...
Believe it or not, I've had that idea in mind a couple of times and more. Why, this is way beyond unimaginable. Sometimes when I wake up, I always feel like it's just one of those weird dreams I'm fabricating to sleep. But hey, it isn't. This is real. This will happen. This is gonna be the next.
I told my friends about this long long time ago. You know, the times when you had everyone in your high school group of friends, evaluating each one's achievement for the past four or five years after graduating... This is one of those things I intend to quite "passingly" mention. And still when I had this finally figured out and decided about, they were shocked.
This is not one of those "pa mystery effect" my friends do often tag me, but this is something more private. I mean, I just cannot mention the details of this as it is very personal and quite confidential. Maybe the pride is bugging me again, but I can't afford to fail. I hope not.
So then, I decided to quit my job, gather my resources, pack my bags, and head somewhere else to find a nest or perhaps build one for my own. My friends took this decision as busted, lame and stupid. And seriously, I understand the concern. I feel so blessed to have people who worry about me and my future but I find it better to have people behind my back, though doubtful, would just tap me and say, "hey it will be okay!"
Wouldn't it be nice to feel secured even if you feel like falling apart? Wouldn't it be nice to feel a lot confident even if you don't know what happens after it all? Wouldn't it be nice to have comforting people who ignite the fire in you and console you all at the same time? My point is, more than anything else, I need moral support. I need all the assurance that I can get.
Tell you what, I know that this is the right time for me. The peak, the point of my life when I should try, but up until now, I'm still convincing myself that this is the right thing, that this is the bravest decision to date.
It might be worth the try or not, who knows? But I know that this is more than the bravery, this is a learning, this is a learning to be brave, this is a learning to go for something I want.
So many questions asked upon me, how am I supposed to react when I don't know the most intricate details. I have plans but of course, sometimes, there's this thing called "acts of God". This is very risky I know but I wouldn't just hide behind my mother's skirt or put on the invisibility cloak, I feel like using my wand and casting the spell, feeling the power within me.
I'm heading there with limited financials but I'm heading there oozing with guts. I know there's a brighter future that awaits me. I believe in prayers. I do believe that since God allowed me to come this far (finally given up my job) I know that He has a purpose. And I am bound to find it out.
Wish me luck. And hey, no negativity alright? :)
Believe it or not, I've had that idea in mind a couple of times and more. Why, this is way beyond unimaginable. Sometimes when I wake up, I always feel like it's just one of those weird dreams I'm fabricating to sleep. But hey, it isn't. This is real. This will happen. This is gonna be the next.
I told my friends about this long long time ago. You know, the times when you had everyone in your high school group of friends, evaluating each one's achievement for the past four or five years after graduating... This is one of those things I intend to quite "passingly" mention. And still when I had this finally figured out and decided about, they were shocked.
This is not one of those "pa mystery effect" my friends do often tag me, but this is something more private. I mean, I just cannot mention the details of this as it is very personal and quite confidential. Maybe the pride is bugging me again, but I can't afford to fail. I hope not.
So then, I decided to quit my job, gather my resources, pack my bags, and head somewhere else to find a nest or perhaps build one for my own. My friends took this decision as busted, lame and stupid. And seriously, I understand the concern. I feel so blessed to have people who worry about me and my future but I find it better to have people behind my back, though doubtful, would just tap me and say, "hey it will be okay!"
Wouldn't it be nice to feel secured even if you feel like falling apart? Wouldn't it be nice to feel a lot confident even if you don't know what happens after it all? Wouldn't it be nice to have comforting people who ignite the fire in you and console you all at the same time? My point is, more than anything else, I need moral support. I need all the assurance that I can get.
Tell you what, I know that this is the right time for me. The peak, the point of my life when I should try, but up until now, I'm still convincing myself that this is the right thing, that this is the bravest decision to date.
It might be worth the try or not, who knows? But I know that this is more than the bravery, this is a learning, this is a learning to be brave, this is a learning to go for something I want.
So many questions asked upon me, how am I supposed to react when I don't know the most intricate details. I have plans but of course, sometimes, there's this thing called "acts of God". This is very risky I know but I wouldn't just hide behind my mother's skirt or put on the invisibility cloak, I feel like using my wand and casting the spell, feeling the power within me.
I'm heading there with limited financials but I'm heading there oozing with guts. I know there's a brighter future that awaits me. I believe in prayers. I do believe that since God allowed me to come this far (finally given up my job) I know that He has a purpose. And I am bound to find it out.
Wish me luck. And hey, no negativity alright? :)
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