living

Whew!

One week is super fast!

Just got back from my weeklong vacation back home. And I realized so many things…

1)      I am not 24 anymore.

As much as I’d like to deny my being in the late 20s and make believe that my age is still where I left it 3 years ago, being home emphasized that I am no longer that young. There are “new breeds”. I went to the mall and sit nonchalantly at a fast-food with clear glass windows… I took time to notice… I saw myself in ladies wearing uniforms, eating and chatting excitedly. You know what, I used to be like that, meeting the same person, talking like there’s no tomorrow. Haha

2)      I need to level up.

As much as I like being in control with the things that I am surrounded by right now, I am not that fulfilled yet. In fact, I feel there is something lacking. I am half empty more than feeling half-full. I feel that there is more to life than living everyday with work as my constant thought-stealer!

3)      I need to make up my mind.

What do I love doing? What are my interests? I need to have a concrete idea of where I will be going. It is time to make up my mind on how I see myself 3 years from now,  being 30 is something I am anxious about. I need to feel stability.

4)      I need to be happy.

Happiness is a choice. What I do, where I am, happiness streams from feeling it within. It should not be based on my bank account or my back up plans or even my company. I love myself and it’s kind of a good thing.

5)      I need to be in love.

This is not limited to a person but in life in general. The only way to keep going is to love what you do and love the people around you and love YOURSELF. There is no bigger glory than being on the same team with people who mean the most to you and there is no bigger success than loving the person that you are more than attempting to sabotage yourself.

Truly, it was a delightful weekend of self-discovery. My biggest goal in going home is to reunite people. Glad, I am reunited with my family and happy that I have been able to be part of reuniting clashing friends.

In this life, we are given tasks, in this life; we don’t always get what we deserve. In this life, we may feel unfairly treated and worse, bullied for the wrong reasons. But you know what, life is never exciting if we always acknowledge only the victories that comes along each fight, it is much more colourful to add the struggles and strategies that we employ to achieve those triumphs.

I can always complain about my struggles, I am not exempted. But as time goes by, I know that I will be proud to acknowledge that I have been through a lot to get to where I am. That alone, is what makes me an active participant more than a spectator of what we call as “living”.