En route
Let’s go home!
My friend, apparently the one I stay with, blurted this out last night. After hearing (errr..reading) that her friend and former colleague was going home from Dubai for good. Her friend told her that the kids need her and she will just find a job back in Davao. And she is confident that with her experience, she’d probably bag a good job back.
She got affected and told me that she wants to go home. Funny, but I find this peculiar feeling of appeasing her and telling her that we’re half way through our initial plan. The usual scenario would be me, telling her that we just go home and be thankful for our experience here in abroad.
I have known from the very start that this adventure is life-changing. I was not in for the money. I was a bird seeking my own place in this world. A bird that’s just too comfortable with the built nest that I felt I needed to see the world from other perspective. I am idealistic that way.
Anyway, staying here opened me to realities and facts that I have come across with. I am thankful for this journey and I am thankful to the people who’ve contributed much for it. But this… now… at this moment… is not the right time to come home yet. No matter how itchy my feet are to come home, it’s just not yet the perfect time. It’s too soon. This adventure is still premature.
I have come to a planning position that this should be at least, a one year stint. After this year, I’ll be coming home, hopefully, with a bulk bank account, more than enough to put up my business-hobby and support my responsibilities (whatever those may be).
To be honest, I want to be home for my nephew. I want to watch him grow. I want to be part of his life’s process. I want to be my parents’ support, just like before. I want to be there for sissy, in her little or huge successes. I want to be there for a meaningful and lifelong career. I want to be there because there’s this somebody telling me that he likes me, and I feel the same way too. But he needs me to come home. Seriously, I just can’t do that. I won’t compromise as to make a continuation out from his idea of a relationship. Again, ideal as it may sound, someone who truly loves me will let me be what I want to be. Someone who likes me should put up with my decisions; after all, being in a relationship should not hinder my growth, in fact, it should nurture it.
You see, I could have lots of reasons to come home. I can name so many things just to be home. That was my heaven on earth, our home. But… it’s just not right to come home and aborting a mission. I always remind myself that in order to succeed, sacrifices are a must. I just can’t cease to be in this mission just because a lot of things are stopping or wanting me to come home. This was for me, a process that I should undergo.
And until such time that I feel that somehow, the thirst for growth was gratified… only then that I can say, It’s time to en route: HOME! :)
My friend, apparently the one I stay with, blurted this out last night. After hearing (errr..reading) that her friend and former colleague was going home from Dubai for good. Her friend told her that the kids need her and she will just find a job back in Davao. And she is confident that with her experience, she’d probably bag a good job back.
She got affected and told me that she wants to go home. Funny, but I find this peculiar feeling of appeasing her and telling her that we’re half way through our initial plan. The usual scenario would be me, telling her that we just go home and be thankful for our experience here in abroad.
I have known from the very start that this adventure is life-changing. I was not in for the money. I was a bird seeking my own place in this world. A bird that’s just too comfortable with the built nest that I felt I needed to see the world from other perspective. I am idealistic that way.
Anyway, staying here opened me to realities and facts that I have come across with. I am thankful for this journey and I am thankful to the people who’ve contributed much for it. But this… now… at this moment… is not the right time to come home yet. No matter how itchy my feet are to come home, it’s just not yet the perfect time. It’s too soon. This adventure is still premature.
I have come to a planning position that this should be at least, a one year stint. After this year, I’ll be coming home, hopefully, with a bulk bank account, more than enough to put up my business-hobby and support my responsibilities (whatever those may be).
To be honest, I want to be home for my nephew. I want to watch him grow. I want to be part of his life’s process. I want to be my parents’ support, just like before. I want to be there for sissy, in her little or huge successes. I want to be there for a meaningful and lifelong career. I want to be there because there’s this somebody telling me that he likes me, and I feel the same way too. But he needs me to come home. Seriously, I just can’t do that. I won’t compromise as to make a continuation out from his idea of a relationship. Again, ideal as it may sound, someone who truly loves me will let me be what I want to be. Someone who likes me should put up with my decisions; after all, being in a relationship should not hinder my growth, in fact, it should nurture it.
You see, I could have lots of reasons to come home. I can name so many things just to be home. That was my heaven on earth, our home. But… it’s just not right to come home and aborting a mission. I always remind myself that in order to succeed, sacrifices are a must. I just can’t cease to be in this mission just because a lot of things are stopping or wanting me to come home. This was for me, a process that I should undergo.
And until such time that I feel that somehow, the thirst for growth was gratified… only then that I can say, It’s time to en route: HOME! :)
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